Any divorce lawyer will tell you the best way to avoid divorce is to stay unmarried. However, marriage and family are extraordinary life experiences that many people look forward to. Ontario is a no-fault divorce state, which means that you only need to prove that the marriage is invalid and cannot be settled to get a divorce. Only one party to separation needs to obtain a divorce in this way. Divorce is never a happy experience, but it doesn’t have to be emotional. Therefore, if separation is inevitable, some measures can be taken to make the divorce process as easy as possible.
- Your spouse does not control you.
One of the best things you can do is to remember that you can control your emotions. You only need one for archiving and two for tango. If your spouse wants to kick and scream, that doesn’t mean you have to kick and scream. If your partner says something means, it doesn’t mean you have to say something mean. Also, this does not mean that you have to lose your temper with their remarks. Avoid telling the last sentence or proving that your spouse is at fault. This may be one of the most painful experiences you or your spouse have ever experienced. Don’t let your spouse’s reaction to divorce control you or control your emotions.
- Maintain a proper perspective.
Divorce involves change. The people we get married are different from the people we divorce. The time you spend together makes you blend in with other people. The same is true for your spouse. Enter this stage of your relationship, a step that the two of you may have never experienced and continue to promote this change. Remembering the person, you are married to throughout the process can help maintain perspective and reduce hatred. This view helps distinguish the problems in divorce so that you can continue to work for the rest of your life. This is a transitional period in your life and your child’s life. Understand that you and your child’s daily activities must adapt. Never forget that you can do hard things.
- Emotional closure does not come when the court indicates the divorce decree.
Don’t expect to be emotionally closed. At least, don’t expect it soon. A person you trust more than others is no longer suitable for you. It hurts. It takes much longer to overcome this pain than the divorce process. But remember, you can control your emotions, and you can do complex things. As part of this, separate the divorce business from the personal emotional development you started. When it comes to family, the emotions are powerful, and the process of divorce only amplifies this feeling. They will not leave quickly.
- Do not talk badly regarding your spouse in front of the kids.
Resist the urge to shout out your ex-husband in front of your children. Never do this. Father will always be a father, and a mother will always be a mother, not a father’s ex-wife or mother’s ex-husband. Respect and encourage your child’s relationship with other parents-this is part of the Ontario Family Law directly written into Ontario public policy. Your children will love you even more because of this. And, if you end up having to go to court, the judge or jury will do the same, which is to your advantage.
- Separate the issues.
Let the children solve problems and then study financial decisions. If you have children, please give priority to the children and ensure their best interests first. Before money comes into play, find out what is best for them. In Ontario, four things usually need to be considered with children:
- the rights and duties of each parent;
- possession of as well as accessibility to the children;
- child support;
- medical support.
Although everything is determined jointly, these are independent issues beyond the division of assets and liabilities. After taking care of your child, all that remains is to make business decisions. This will allow you to separate cases and avoid emotions in business decisions.
- Avoid going to court unless it is necessary.
Avoid unnecessary, adversarial court hearings. It is necessary to maintain an open dialogue and to think about the solution. Going to court is always an option, and in some cases or even essential in some cases. However, always consider costs: financial and emotional costs. It is necessary for the law to appear in court, but not for emotion. Remember, your spouse’s behaviour cannot control your behaviour. You don’t always have to have the last word. As you proceed to keep that open mind and are willing to discuss, the number of people in court reduces to a minimum, costs are reduced, and emotions will be easier to control.
- Be innovative.
Both you and your spouse want something. Sometimes this can be the same thing. However, in most cases, there are at least some differences. Good at solving problems. Brainstorm. Consider different ownership schedules or property divisions. Discuss with your family lawyer or mediator to come up with ideas for solving these problems. Look at it from different angles. You can ask yourself why you want what you want and then understand why your spouse wants what he or she wants. If you’re going to cut an orange, maybe one person wants to peel it from the peel, and another person wants it to make orange juice. Everyone can achieve their goals.
- This is your separation.
You are the one who makes the decision. This is not your parents’ divorce. This is not the divorce of your best friend. They have their ideas and opinions on what should be done, but you can control it. If you are satisfied with the upcoming settlement offer, please do not let others reject you. If you do, you should at least ask them to pay your attorney’s fees and court fees, as this will guide them.
In the end, separation is an unpleasant time. Even if you are out of trouble and there are better days in the future, it can be stressful, frightening, and challenging. But you can do hard things. You can also do something to make this divorce process as smooth as possible.
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